The Cheapest Way to Whiten Your Teeth

In high school I lived with my bachelor father, an orthopedic surgeon. One day after school & rummaging through the basement I jumped off a foot locker and landed on a hose and badly twisted my ankle.

Like a good little bone expert prodigy I went upstairs, elevated my foot on the couch arm, applied an ice pack to my badly swollen ankle, turned on MTV and waited for my father to get home from work.

Arriving and seeing me in my recumbent, injured state, he asked what happened. I told him and then showed him that it hurt to “turn my ankle like this” while demonstrating the slightest, stiff movement of my toes to the right (…or left, I can’t remember).

Anticipating some serious doctor dad concern, empathy and care, he said, in all seriousness….

(are you ready for this?)….

“Well then, don’t do that.” And walked away. 

Needless to say I was not pleased with his couch-side manner, huffed a little, rolled my eyes, maybe even cried out of self-pity…and more than likely cranked up the volume on MTV.

Years later, it all made sense. 

And what does it have to do with whitening your teeth?

Simple. Stop staining them.

You’ll save money & have whiter teeth.

Here are the biggest staining culprits: tobacco, coffee, black tea, and red wine.

If you like having white teeth and you find that you need to use whitening agents to keep your teeth white, then perhaps you’re using/drinking too much of what causes stains.

Well, Carla, no one likes to hear that.

Yeah, I know. But don’t shoot the messenger.

Cause & effect. Choice & consequence. I know many people who would rather continue spending money on whitening agents and continue with whatever is staining their teeth. Fine, but I don’t want to hear you then complain that organic food is too expensive to buy.

It’s all about personal priorities, values & choices…and each one of us is free to decide.

You can have naturally white teeth for free and save oodles of money by not purchasing whitening agents, tobacco, coffee, black tea or red wine. 

How about transitioning to green tea and white wine?

Not only will your wallet get fatter, but your health just may improve. And your teeth will certainly be less stained. While you’re at it, become a committed flosser. Healthy pink gums along those pearly whites are a quintessential sign of good health. (I’m assuming you’re already a diligent & regular brusher.)

I used to drink coffee while smoking my cigarettes. I once loved red wine and would get a kick over everyone’s purple teeth by the end of the night. (That would totally not be funny sober.) I used to whiten my teeth. I even dabbed them with Clorox once during a stupid moment.

Now I don’t whiten my teeth because I don’t stain them. People assume that because I am married to a dentist that I get all the whitening gels & trays for free. Nope. Could my teeth be whiter? Sure, but I’m not into that artificially whiter-than-white chalky look. And I prefer to keep the chemicals out of my mouth.

While transitioning into a naturally white tooth care regime, be sure to amp up your intake of fresh, crunchy apples so that they can help scrub away those pesky ol’ stains. And splurge on the organic apples to avoid pesticide residue while getting greater nutrition than conventional apples.

An apple a day will keep the doctor away….except the ones to keep close, like a father & husband. ;o) Love you guys!

PS – I know that there are medications that influence the color of teeth. Do what you can about that (the damage may be done & permanent) and whiten if you want to.